1. Me: "See how (5+3)/(1+3) = 2? It does not = 5, right? So no one is going to break my heart and cancel terms that are not factors, right?"
Kid: "Why are you showing us this? This is like teaching someone to use a computer by opening it up and looking at the insides."
Me: "Let's get one thing straight. Opening it up and showing you the insides IS MY JOB."
2. Kid: "You know I just realized something really cool - if you showed me this problem 20 minutes ago I would have looked at you like you were crazy, but now I can do it! And it's easy!"
Other Kid (deadpan): "The miracle of learning."
3. Me: "The Smartboard has this neat tool I just found, look." (I freehand the graph of an ellipse by connecting some plotted points, and when I lift the pen, the shape snaps to a perfect curve.)
Kid: "But can she make a Kessel run in 12 parsecs?"